So, I work in an office with a few coworkers, and we recently got a new fancy coffee machine. I’ve always been a bit of a coffee snob (not proud, but it’s true), and I’ve spent the last few months perfecting my coffee-making technique. I take my coffee seriously—like, really seriously. I grind the beans fresh, measure the water precisely, and get the milk foam just right. Honestly, it’s borderline an art form at this point.
One day, I made an extra cup and offered it to a coworker who was struggling through the morning. They took a sip, and their eyes lit up like they’d just seen the face of God. They immediately asked if I could make them one every day. Naturally, I obliged, because I’m a nice person, right?
Then it escalated. Word got out about my “magical” coffee-making skills, and suddenly, I had a line of people at my desk every morning asking for their “fix.” I thought it was just a fun office ritual, so I started setting up a mini coffee station with all the supplies. But now, it’s a full-on daily event. People are literally gathering around my desk, chatting, waiting for their coffee, and it’s become a weird little social club.
The other day, someone jokingly referred to it as “the coffee cult” and asked if I was planning on starting any other rituals, like chanting or wearing robes. I laughed, but now I’m starting to wonder if maybe I’ve gone too far. I just wanted to make a nice cup of coffee, but now I feel like I’m running some kind of office café empire.
AIOR for unintentionally turning my coffee routine into an office “cult” just because I wanted to share a good cup of joe?
Honestly, I think you’re just a pioneer in the art of office coffee culture. First, it’s a cult, next thing you know, you’ll have t-shirts, an official anthem, and maybe even a secret handshake. “You want a seat at the coffee table? You gotta pass the initiation: 3 sips, no complaining about the temperature, and a firm handshake to confirm you’re really committed to the coffee life.”
But hey, if you’re not getting paid for this coffee cult leadership role, at least ask for some of those “incredible benefits” you mentioned. Free snacks? Maybe you can score free coffee beans out of this whole thing. Worst case scenario, you’re one step away from starting a work cult that’s more “caffeine-fueled productivity” and less “end-of-the-world prophecy.”
You’re NTOR, but you might want to warn HR before they start looking into a budget for “Caffeine Worship.”