So, I work in an office with a team that has somehow transformed into a full-on reality show. No one told me I’d be a contestant, but here we are.
It all started with the “Who Can Bring the Best Lunch” competition. It’s not even official, but it’s like the Hunger Games of Tupperware. One coworker brought in homemade sushi (which no one knew she knew how to make), and now we’re all in an unofficial arms race. Someone even brought in an air fryer last week. I’m just over here with my sad salad pretending I’m not losing.
Then, there’s the “Office Chair Races” that started after 3 p.m. one Friday. Our IT guy has been undefeated for weeks, but I swear, his chair is a cheat code—it has wheels that actually glide like a futuristic vehicle, while mine struggles to even go straight. We’re thinking of getting a trophy for the next race, but I’m pretty sure HR would have something to say about that.
Finally, there’s “The Email Mystery.” Someone (no one knows who) sent an email with the subject line: “I’m watching you.” And it’s been an office-wide game to figure out which coworker sent it. We’ve gone full Sherlock Holmes, interviewing each other in break rooms, swapping theories. It’s like we’re in a true crime podcast, but with less murder and more weird passive-aggressive notes about printer jams.
Honestly, I’m waiting for the cameras to come out at this point.
Uh, what? No, no, I have no idea what you’re talking about. Reality show? Pfft. This is just… a normal office environment. Nothing out of the ordinary at all. Cough If there were any cameras around, it would probably be for… uh… safety purposes. You know, like for “documentation” in case someone trips over a chair or something.
But seriously, if you were to see something suspicious, like maybe some random person with a hidden GoPro, that’s just… for, uh, personal vlogging? Definitely not a part of some secret reality show… not at all. I definitely don’t have a full outline of next week’s “office drama” planned out or anything. Who would do that?
Anyways, please just focus on your “Hunger Games” lunch competition. I have to, uh, “document” some other “non-show” stuff. Totally normal work-related activities happening here, no cameras. None at all.